Back in St Annes with my family so wonderful to be with my sisters and brothers working and staying at home with my mum and her new husband Stanley a retired income tax inspector and lifelong bachelor with no children my mum managed to snag him up and he yes he married her.
I was working different jobs I would like them for a while then get bored and move on to something else still did not know what I wanted to do when I grow up. Just to give you an idea in those years I was a Texaco girl pumping gas, a window dresser, retail jewelry,clothing,groceries store cashier. Office workshop stint at Premium Bonds filling all day.
Took as many ballroom classes and social dance as I could and tried to learn the guitar, during this time.Then I got a job working in a Council home for the elderly, and I loved it .Started out as a n attendant bathing feeding and general care of elderly bed patients and worked my way up in a shot time to assistant matron at age 22.
Met my first husband Jim Shenton tall dark handsome charming guy, who I fell madly in love with though he was 9 years my senior was previously married and had children.We bought a little house in Black pool and I got a job close to my house in a bigger nursing home for the blind. I loved my job and loved taking care of the elderly, I was strict with my staff and devoted to my resident’s, we had our own mortuary and in those day’s we let people die peacefully in our home not in the hospital whenever possible so we pretty much did everything we could for them to have dignity and peace in passing.
Now here I was in Hull and my dad coming and going on the fishing trawlers gone for weeks and home drunk and crazy for a week or 10 days then back to the ship. A life of hell I had a good job that I really liked as a cashier in the canteen of a government training center,but other than my job I had no life no friends of my own age, no music no dancing, and was trapped in a dysfunctional relationship with my dad.
Every time I wanted to leave he would threaten to commit suicide and I really thought he would do it and felt trapped I wanted to leave but was afraid he would die if I left. I could not date or have any friends he would scare them away and was destroying my spirit. I hit rock bottom and had a nervous breakdown.
I was 18 years old and woke up in a hospital my wrists bandaged up and in the bed next to me a very pretty young women was ranting and raving her screams pain and anguish of her life told for hours in the darkness of the night . I listened to her words and felt her pain and realized that I did not want to be her.
I spent the time between age 16 and 18 in and around Blackpool and St Annes spending time with my sisters and brother who had now moved from Ashton-Under-Lyne to St Annes, first staying with Auntie Minnie and Margaret and later moving in to my own house. I had my own flat with a couple of my friends and went from job to job trying to make enough money to live.
I did product promotions in retail stores for a while, was a demonstration of novelty items such as the ream clean brush that picked up anything from crumbs to nails in one sweep,and the non slip trays that were coated with a film of plastic to stop the items such as plates and silverware from sliding around when you carried them. I was good at this as I put on a show and gathered a crowd around my booth, and would do a live demo of the product.
This was a salary based on commissions so was tough, even though I was selling a lot, sometimes the boss would not pay me and once I was thrown out of the store by the police because my boss had not paid the rent for the booth in the store. I even did a few gigs singing in a local pub and was always looking for ways to make a living but did not really know what I wanted to do. All I was sure of was that I wanted to dance and be around music and musicians every chance I got, even though that meant underage drinking and hanging out sometimes in the wrong places.
My Aunts lived in a very posh area of St. Annes On the Sea which is just outside of the famous sea-side resort Blackpool. The house was a big 3 story detached home on Orchard Road and was impressive when you walked in to the entrance and saw the winding iron staircase. The house was cold I mean freezing cold and though filled with beautiful antiques and had a baby grand piano in the front room, it was anything but home. No central heat, no fire, no comfortable couch, no music, no life.
They were demanding and strict old-fashioned spinsters with no understanding of young people or their needs. I was devoted to looking after them, especially my Auntie Margaret, who had horrible ulcerated legs and was unable to do for herself. I liked her though and she made me laugh sometimes. My aunt Minnie was a cold hard woman, who showed no emotion for life or other people. She was a real eccentric lady, who lived surrounded by luxury but had no comforts.
There was never any food and what there was many cans of salmon and fruit. She kept these locked up in a cabinet and she kept the key in her pocket. You had to beg her for the key to get anything. She would drink a cup of tea with whiskey in it every morning at 6.30 am and would send me miles in the cold and rain to the store for her teacher’s whiskey because it was a few pennies cheaper.
Of course they never had a car they walked or took a taxi not that they ever really went anywhere much, Just once a week they would go to the cafe for high tea or afternoon tea. They had plenty of money but would not spend it for the normal living expenses.
I worked in a pharmacy in the town center, walking distance from the house. My life was lonely; I missed my brothers and sisters. I had nothing but my music. There was the Blackpool Tower and The Mecca Ballroom; I was there every chance I got. I would take two buses and was still sneaking in sometimes without paying, but oh the dancing, wow. They had disco nights that were heaven on earth for me. The Tower Ballroom once you had a ticket to enter the Tower you could go in the ballroom all day for free.
This was the home of the original Wurlitzer organ, it would rise up from beneath the stage as the organist played, and it was magnificent. The ballroom was beautifully carved and decorated with a ceiling like the Sistine Chapel and still to this day that ballroom hosts dancers from all over the world, especially now international line dancers, teachers, choreographers and some of the biggest and best known line dance events in the world.
I left my aunties house and went to live and work at the Imperial Hotel in downtown Blackpool. This was the started to another chapter of my life, which is not one I am proud of, but one that would lead me one more step forward.
Throughout my childhood years, I found solace and escape through music. I had a little AM transistor radio with a wire with an earpiece that I pressed deep in to my ear so my head was filled with music. The sounds of the world blocked out even during the nights when my parents would be having another one of their screaming matches.
I could sometimes escape to oblivion and be lost in the sounds of The Four Tops, The Supremes, Englebert Humperdinck. Gerry and the Pacemakers, The Monkeys, Tom Jones, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, Elvis Presley and soooo many others. I could sing every word of every song and Sunday night was my favorite when they played the top forty. Even though it was late in the night before school next day I never missed a song.
The first record I bought, I saved up for ages and went to the store for the single, ”I’m a Believer’ by the Monkey’s, and I think the B side was Strawberry Fields. We had a record player that you manually cranked with a handle and I played that record over and over till my arm was aching from winding it. Wish I had that player today would be worth a fortune now.
I also played piano at home and sometimes relatives would come for a visit and play modern music. Some boogie woogie on the piano, it was lively and fun and we would all sing. My Mum only played classical music, so it was great to sing and see the piano bouncing up and down with the more vibrant lively stuff. My auntie Bobby was fantastic she was like a female Liberace, and all my brothers were excellent singers.
I would also dance every chance I got, some ballet that was paid for from family business for a while till mum was thrown out for being in the pub every day and running it in to the ground. I loved Ballet, I was a natural talented dancer they said and as a small petite child did very well and tap dancing as well. In school we had some dance classes mainly contra style barn dances and circles. Kind of what they call today Scottish Country dancing. I just remember I loved every second of it. Then later, I did a little line dancing at the youth club but I was only there for a brief time due to circumstances at home.
As I entered my teen years, I gained weight and developed large boobies, I guess I was a BIG girl. I still sang and danced. I was light on my feet and plugged in to all music from classical piano, pop, country, Rock N roll, and Irish. I was a member of a Scottish Highland band where I learned drums and yes, bagpipes. I did the step dancing with the crossed swords on the ground and yes, I guess I did the Highland Fling.
What I can tell you is music and danced brought me joy and happiness, when there was none anywhere else. I found myself drawn to the ballrooms and would spend hours just watching people dance. I would sneak in and hide in a dark place in the corner so I would not be seen. The circle dances were fun and I found myself learning the steps and the patterns even though I could not join in.
Later on I was able to go to the Tower Ballroom in Blackpool in the afternoons and do these dances. But I will tell you more about that later as that is where the World Line Dance events are now held. More to come. Stella
part 7
